ready

today.  today i am becoming ready. stressed. ready. 
letting things roll off my back is a skill i feel i gained with patience. both virtues i hope to perfect. as they seem to come and go in this infant point.  i feel fairly confident about the next two weeks.  saying good byes for the second time this year in this town i have such strong feelings for.  watching my mother struggle with dillemmas.  remembering every thing will fall into place. 
one thing that i will gracefully reflect on today is a sense of confidence. confidence in choices, in self-awareness, in attitude, in self-preservation. in spite of always coming across as confident.  partly because i was.  i have been noticing a drastic change in the way that confidence feels.  my confidence in recent months seems less cocky. at times less contrived.  more sparsely noticed. although i cant say i recall noticing my feelings towards my confidence previously.  i feel a general positive disposition towards it now.  in simple terms. i like how my confidence has blossomed and i feel confident about where it is headed.  it feels healthy.